Public Transit and I do not mix.
Douchebag.
I sit down. A pregnant woman comes in with two men. They look Middle Eastern. she has a Burka on. Her face isn't completely covered. I offer her a seat, and her husband yells at me!!! One of the men wanted my seat! What idiocy is this? I throw them a look of disgust and mutter about the absurdity of their religion. I hope he heard me. So they get off. I of course throw him another look of derision.
Sorta like this but she was pregnant and standing.
Why couldn't she have been her? WHY?????
Then this... gigantomopolous...Cthulu like BEAST collapses down in a prime example of the laws of Thermodynamics as the fluids within her meat sac of a body slosh about without much resistance next to me. I, of course, get hit by the shrapnel which is her heavily salted and probably seasoned sweat on my arm and leg. I think it stained my pants.
Kim Jong Il!
She smelled like... you know when you leave chicken out in the sun too long or over-ripe Papaya that you partially digested but threw up because your friends were daring you to throw back that one last shot of tequila?? Well...she smelled of foul things and dead things....
She then asked for the whole seat because of her...disability. So I stayed quiet. My upper lip twitched. I was already mad I had to sit with the masses of dystopia but now she wants me to give up MY seat??
And then she asked again and was upset I was not abdicating my hard won seat among the great unwashed. I shoved seveal chattering asian girls out of the way for that seat. Their Hello Kitty accessories were a testament to their inability to fucking move out of my way. (They were literally oblivious. Completely oblivious to ... ugh that's another post)
Oh Look, Bloor and Spadina
So I said something kinda rude...I should be nicer... pretty much i told her that being fat isnt a disability, it's a liability and frankly I'm not giving you my seat. Standing up might do you some good. It's done wonders for me. I patted my shrinking belly. (I think it's shrinking) I quickly turned back to my Angry Birds in a vain attempt to get all the Stars.
She said I was very rude and should apologize. I told her I was busy. She plodded off in a huff at the next station, leaving behind a cloud of foul stench and the dying screams of puppy dogs everywhere. Some people chuckled but no one reacted. Typical Passive aggressive Canadian wimps.
Hard at work!!! Tax Money Well Spent.
This is the TTC. It stands for . Take the Fucking Car. Over paid redundant workers, on a limited, stalled unexpanded system, which does not link up to the rest of our transit, controlled by buffoons in the mayors office and operated by... humpff... Unions.
I dunno
I still smelled like her when I got off the train, by the way. I had looks in the rotunda by people. LOOKS.
Next time, I'm bringing a skunk on with me. Every time someone comes in through the doors, I yank the Skunks tail and aim the spray at the unsuspecting plebe.
"Back you heathen! Back I say. Back to the Belly of Satan with you. This CAR IS MINE"
Thank you
and I found this link which amused me.
That's me. Yes... I wear leathers and coon skin hats to work.
